I went to a wake for a friend and cousin who died after several years dementia in his mid 70’s. At the wake all appeared to be normal the kids (now in their mid 30’s) and the wife (I will call him Sam and lets call her Alice) was there greeting everyone and playing the part of a grieving family.
What was not obvious was all the drama that had taken place for that to exist. Sam was a great gym teacher, coach, and referee all his life to those around him. At home he was controlling, belittled his children for not accomplishing what he thought they should have.
His daughter was never thin enough though she could have easily passed as a model at any show. His son after getting laid off twice as a librarian decided that the family would take home almost as much with him staying home, as paying to put their two children in child care.
His Dad could not accept that, and they always had fights, every time they got together. I got thinking, why was Sam this way?
I knew his family as I was growing up. I think his father was very controlling and towards his children and his wife but never thought anything of it. I think this was passed on down to Sam.
Now you have a grieving widow struggling with Sams death, and two children who hate their Dad and had to be pleaded with to attend the wake.
Alice is also grieving the loss of travel and adventures in retirement that she had hoped would have happened. They never did those things while he was healthy and alive.
So why do I push people to make the most of their lives? Because you never know what is around the corner. Celebrate life and family, don’t push your agendas upon others whether it is your children, family, friends or others.
Life is for living and celebrating it and that is the purpose of my blog. Go out and explore, do something fun with your spouse and make a memory that you can pass on down.
If you have struggled with this question and others then go to Patterson2Y2R,com/blog should be a place you should visit to share your stories and challenges.
I have an ear that would love to hear your stories. Let’s taste the real meaning of life. I am still working on my course with the goal of launching a starter course, and I will keep you abreast as to how the process goes.
If you want to participate in this process and join my first class please send me an email to bobchuckpatterson@yahoo.com
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